Why I am not going to see "Snakes on a Plane"

I decided last night that I am not going to see "Snakes on a Plane".

I blame it all on Danger Bay.

When I was little, I used to watch a lot of Danger Bay. What was not to like about Danger Bay? Grant Roberts (SuperVet!) and his kids, Jonah and Nicole, had various marine biology/environmental crime adventures in and around the Vancouver Aquarium. They lived on an island. Jonah and Nicole took a school boat to school. Totally Must See TV, especially if you only got two TV channels.

One night, there was an episode where someone was bitten by a poisonous snake, and Grant had to race against the clock to find an antidote. The episode was full of menacing close-up shots of The Snake. Characters' lives were hanging in the balance.

Very scary stuff for a little girl who is used to watching Mr. Dressup and Fraggle Rock.

For years after I saw that episode, I was utterly convinced that The Snake from Danger Bay was going to come into my house at night and kill me. I was so scared that I would always sleep with my back to the bedroom door, thinking that if The Snake came into my room to bite me, at least I wouldn't see it coming. It was only within the last few years that I was able to break myself of this habit.

I thought I had totally conquered my fear of The Snake, until last night, when I finally saw some footage from Snakes on a Plane. Then the memories came flooding back to me, and I was once again gripped by terror at the thought of You Know What attacking me in my sleep.

So, even though it seems like the movie is going to be a minor cult hit, I will not be going to see it. I just don't think I want to be reduced to a quivering wreck in the middle of a movie theatre. No thanks.